Depression is an illness that not only affects the person dealing with it but also everyone around her. My family and I have been affected since I was diagnosed with depression.

I was diagnosed with Clinical Depression, which is also known as major depression. It affects the way I eat, sleep, my mood and thoughts.

Luckily, depression hasn’t affected my school work, but it has affected every other part of my life.

I’m a dancer and have been for 15 years, but once my depression kicked in, dance hasn’t been the same. I dread going to practice to see the people who once made me laugh and smile. I dread going to the place that once used to be my safe place.

I am constantly in bed writing on my blog or sleeping.

What used to be my daddy/daughter days have now consisted of me sleeping saying, “We can do it next week, Dad.” But I seem to be saying those few words constantly, every week and then it never happens.

Waking up knowing I have to go school and face hundreds of people just makes me cringe. Going to school consists of me piling on makeup to cover the little scars on my face, doing my hair to feel a little better than I did when I woke up. Seeing my friends means having to fake a smile so I’m not asked thousands of times “What’s wrong?” or “Are you okay, Bailey?”

Depression isn’t something my friends have dealt with, so they don’t understand when I don’t want to go out to eat with them or to go to the football games. They don’t fully comprehend how my brain handles things.

Depression is overwhelming anxiety and stress. I’m constantly thinking someone’s after me or everyone is against me which affects every bit of my social life.

My mom has to force me to go out and do stuff with my friends. She doesn’t get why I constantly want to lie in my bed instead of have fun.

This is an ongoing struggle with me but thankfully I have been blessed with an amazing support system. My family and friends are constantly lifting me up and one day, with God’s grace, I will overcome this illness.

Right now, it might be hard, but with the strength I have built over the past few years, I know I can get through it.

Even if it is one step at a time.